01 November 2012

Plumped & Ready

I'm not quite sure how to tell you this. I, myself, can barely believe it's true. But facts are facts and there is no hiding from said facts. So here goes.

I've gain a bunch of weight. A. Bunch. 

This isn't one of those Oprah "how did this happen" moments. I know exactly how it happened. I've been able to trace it very clearly back to August. 

I left my old job. 
I started celebrating. 
I have not stopped. 

It's gone from "cheers to this new opportunity," to "cheers to the ability to go to happy hour," to simply "cheers." I started walking less and taking the bus more. In my defense, the walk to the new job is twice as long at the walk to the old job. Also, I liked the feel of being one of the masses. But guess what? Plenty of the masses walk to work. And a 30 minute walk is not at all ridiculous. And friends are capable of more than just eating and drinking. 

Now here I sit. Plumped up for action. I've gained 20lbs this year. I'm pretty sure - based on the way my clothes (don't) fit - most of that came between August - October. The thing is, I also gained 10lbs in 2011, putting me 30lbs from my healthiest and 50lbs from my goal. 

I have 50lbs to lose. That's nothing short of disgusting. And I am disgusted. 

At the same time, I'm a little proud of me. I've had this weight before. I've gained this weight before. Only then, I didn't listen to my body. This time, I'm paying proper attention. My body is unhappy. It's had it's fill of risotto balls and steak fries and breakfast burritos (with tator tots INSIDE). I can't remember ever loving brown rice as much as I have in the last two weeks. I've been craving plain oatmeal. I've even lost my taste for lattes. My insides are itching for improvement. I went to a boxing class last night, even though I was sure I was going to pass out. Surprisingly, my body was ready. Not only did I survive, I was even giddy afterward.

So yes, we're 50lbs from the finish. But for once my brain and my body are in sync. The gallbladder has been quiet. I feel good. My skin looks great. All signs point to better health. It's go time. And that's exciting.