15 December 2010

October 2010 | Food, Flowers, Friends

Food (10.09.10)
I had a visitor in early October. His name was then and is still Jonathan. I met Jonathan when we worked together in Vegas. We always got along. We always had fun. Ours is a friendship that developed easily and is comfortable. More than a lot of people, Jonathan understood me in October. And even though his trip to San Francisco was about him, it was great for me too.

I'm not going to tell you what we discussed, or how we discussed it. I will tell you talking to him made me feel less alone. I had started to feel like a visitor in my own life. I was going through the motions, laughing when I was supposed to laugh and crying when no one could see. Despite knowing better, I felt like I was experiencing heartbreak for the first time in humanity, and that no one would ever feel it as intensely as I would. Jonathan showed me otherwise. We made metaphors until we could describe the it that was draining us both. And once that was established, once we felt understood, we were free to talk about friend things, like food.

We ate at Tony's which I have decided is my go to place with guests. I think XBFJ may also try to claim it, but it's in my neighborhood and he really ought to know better. Jonathan and I talked property taxes and the future of news and the beauty that is San Francisco. Yeah, we are a rare, boring breed. But we ate really well.

His.

Mine.


I showed him what it takes to park in my neighborhood. We drove to Sausalito and toured a houseboat neighborhood. We inched our way back across the Golden Gate, spending a lot of time in traffic. We mocked strollers and studied small to mid-sized dogs. We were battle buddies, more connected than I think we had been in the past and it was exactly what I needed. His words were worth more than those who had been through it before, because he was going through it. That mattered. And then he was gone, just like my truffle-less pizza.

Flowers (10.10.10)
As part of my check out from reality, I got really wrapped up in small things, like marigold bulbs. I have a marigold plant. It was actually a seed from a package I got in the dollar section at Target. I bought the seeds because they came in a tiny pot, because I like tiny things. I kept the tiny pot and packaged seeds for years. They moved from Vegas to San Francisco with a sunflower counterpart. I planted both in early 2010 and started getting sprouts in February. Fast forward to October. The marigold was thriving inside the apartment, and the sunflowers were all dead. They never stood a chance. XBFJ would not let me keep them inside once they reached 5 feet tall. He refused to see they wre still delicate. He was and likely still is a plant hater. Once the elements got to sunflowers, it was all over. They began dying just as we did, sometime over the summer.

But the marigold thrived, teaching me its cycle. Bulbs sprout. They grow. They open. And then they die. I would prune the dead sprouts and throw them away. And then one day I didn't. I kept the dead sprouts and let them compost in the pot with the dirt. I just wanted to see what would happen. The result was mold. The dead bulbs molded like plant based materials do I guess. Can you imagine me living with mold? Exactly. I sat down one day to either bury or toss the moldy remains. And I made the most amazing discovery. Ever.

A regular healthy bulb. I'm not sure why it was even severed.

A dead bulb.

One of the dead bulbs had sprouted a whole new plant. Maybe you knew the bulbs held the seeds but I did not. And I tell you it blew my mind. I was thrilled. I sent a tweet. I sent the picture to my parents and to Kate. I am sure no one cared as much as I did, but I thought it was news worth sharing. It really does not take much to amuse me. I spent an hour or so cracking open other dead bulbs and looking at their seeds. I planted lots of them, filling every flower pot I could find. I then watered and waited.

More Friends (10.15.10)
I got to see Mariana, Ajit & LaTrisha again, which was nice. I should mention Mariana moved to Reno. She got a job there, which is the blessing and the curse of this business. I've made friends who now live around the world. At some point, we lived together, at least in the same city. And now, every two years or so, those friends move. Still. I was grateful for one night with them. It almost didn't happen. I had to work late and got to the bar just as they were leaving. It was already the go-get-food part of the night. And you know at? I like food, so I was okay with that.

We ate at Crepes A Go Go. It was delicious and I look forward to any and all circumstances that bring me back there. Imagine eating something light after drinking, something that won't give you indigestion, but that is hot and oh-so yummy. Dare I write it, Crepes A Go Go is the way to go. Go. Yeah. That just happened. We didn't talk about, they were already the point when conversations go in circles. But it was nice to be near them.