08 December 2010

Familiar Faces

I am not yet convinced time heals anything, but I know it changes things. For one, I decided I was not moving. Our apartment had never been finished. Leaving it would leave me with an incomplete task. And we can't have that. Besides, there was only one of us turning our backs on everything and it was certainly not me. Plus I simply did not feel like it. I truly believe moving is the worst thing people choose to do to themselves (right after drugs). So I hatched a new plan.

Jesse changed too. He started disappearing for days at a time. He reminded me I had no right to ask where he was going, even though he still had the right to ask me to do his laundry. We would chat some days, but never too much. Slowly the volume on everything else went up. Stuff had to be sorted. Bills needed to be paid. Names had to be removed and passwords changed. There was an explosion in San Bruno and work was exciting again. Two weeks in September passed without incident. And then XBFJ & I were forced into cooperation by the arrival of Adam & Amber.

Part of me wonders why Jesse invited them to visit us, when he didn't want to be around me. And believe me, by that point it was clear he didn't want anything to do with me. The other part of me is glad he did. Adam & Amber have been there from the start, when Jesse & I were just "hanging out" for two years. They visited us in Vegas, and witnessed peaks and valleys. If anyone had to see our awkward attempt at friendship, I suppose they were the best candidates. They offered to cancel their trip, but that didn't seem necessary.

15 September 2010

I picked Adam & Amber up from the airport before I went to work. Aside from losing my own car in the parking garage, everything went smoothly. Parking was simple. The weather was bearable and I didn't have to talk about the BU. We stopped at a place near my job for lunch, where we had freshly caught and seared tuna for lunch. One of the best parts of bringing people to San Francisco is blowing up their taste buds. We have some delicious treats, born of the same uppity, bourgeois habits that get us ridiculed. These tuna sandwiches were part of Adam & Amber's taste bud explosion.

We walked along the Embarcadero as they made their plans. I went to work and updated Jesse. He was furious their bed hadn't been made. And I mean furious. I am talking insult hurling, character disparagingly furious. It embarrasses me, even though what he said it just between us. Put it this way; it was so horrible, I keep the chat to re-read any time I think I might ever want him back. But on the off chance he was right, I left work to blow up their air mattress. It was very abused-spouse-cleaning-after-a-fight of me. But I thought it was the best way to move forward.

That night they all went out while I was at work. Jesse talked to me when he came home. He doesn't remember what he said, but I do, and it was hopeful for us. And then he ran away. He literally ran away and didn't come back that night. Eventually he would apologize for giving that hope, because (let's face it) he's cruel.

Adam & Amber spent the next two days touring the city. They had a bus tour from a man I will proclaim to be the best tour guide in the greater Bay Area. No, I've never met him. No I have not taken his tour. No, I do not remember his name. But just the stuff they remembered off the cuff was impressive. It was enough to make me want to take the tour. And I promise, one day I will. Seriously, they came away knowing more about my city than I did. And that just can't be.