So I look for things. I listen to feelings and find comfort in whatever may be a message from the universe. Such a message appeared on my fire escape in mid-November. Specifically, it was in the pot that housed the remains of my once glorious sunflowers. They all died right after the cruise (a sign unto itself?) and after I cut all the dead stems, I left the pot outside. Let's be honest, the fire escape was the most organized area at the time. One day I looked and lo and behold:I went to work with my mom and she was bothered. The "spirit" was warning her about Derek. We drove from PA to NY and halfway through my mom's shift, she got a call. Derek had been detained for stealing a golf cart. And during the tirade that was to come my mom kept saying "the spirit told me something was up with Derek. I knew it." I became a believer.
I had sprouts! two teeny spots of green in that giant pot of dead and decaying flower parts. Naturally they could not stay outside. It was November. It had been cold and it had been raining. Honestly I don't even know how those delicate little leaves found their way out of the dirt. I don't even know that they're sunflowers, since I don't remember seeing or planting any seeds. That had been my intention, but bees and wasps had loved my sunflowers, and I had given them their space. I will not make that mistake again; I think those bugs infected my flowers.
My takeaway was, from the most miserable of cold and icky conditions came fresh and healthy and sprouts. A stronger metaphor could not have slapped me in the face. I received the message loud and clear. I myself was ready to sprout.